How would you deal with a cheating gf/wife

[Emma tenywa]

I know i shouldn't be here whinning about my personal shit, but this has knocked me right off my feet. I spent the whole weekend trying to figure out how to deal with her. What hurts most is that she got layed in as less time as two weeks!! This has tormented my mind to the fullest. I felt like hitting the hell out of her but that wouldn't change anything either.so i just kept ahold of myself. I just don't know how to deal with her at the moment

 

[sbisteve]

Move on now and save yourself a lot of heart ache down the road. You will find someone who cares about you and wants to spend the rest of their life you, without cheating on you. That’s all I got. Roll Tide!!!

 

[Deleted member 2886]

Oh man, you have my sympathy @Emma tenywa .

I think you're absolutely justified and free to "whine" about anything here.

Been through something similar aye, it actually put me off even bothering with women for the past decade now.
(ie: Relationship wise)

Jmo, and sorry bro, I can understand how very difficult the practical application of this advise can be,...in the moment.,...

I reckon the most beneficial course of action, whether short or long term, is calmly removing one's physical self from the situation,...entirely.

It's important to understand that the whole reason for removing ones self, is to actually allow for a breif respite from the ceaseless-
psychologically & emotionally chaotic shitstorm,...which will certainly be occuring.

It is necessary to temporarily cease, or limit all levels of interaction, overall.
(ie: Psychologically, Emotionally, & Spiritually)

There's wisdom in the words you've written bro,...knocked ya right off your feet.

In a metaphorical sense,...the wise post by @sbisteve is not much different than if physically extending his hand to help a fallen brother.

Just like this post I'm writing for you bro.

 

[ChicagoFats]

Move on now and save yourself a lot of heart ache down the road. You will find someone who cares about you and wants to spend the rest of their life you, without cheating on you. That’s all I got. Roll Tide!!!

Probably the best advice. The world is a big place and there is a better match for you out there somewhere.

Cut off all communication …. Just stop, like ripping off a band aid.

 

[PerdidoKeyFrisbee]

Like @sbisteve and the others said.......leave. Better to do it without showing any emotion. She actually did you a favor. What if you stayed with her for another 20 years with her hooring around on you? That's 20 years you'd never get back and maybe a STD you couldn't give back.

On the way out the door tell her "thanks for the sects" and hit the road. Next, start slinging your meat sickle around like a butcher jacked up on caffeine.

 

[tiderollsonu]

Best way to get over a woman is get under another

 

[Dolphincock]

I know i shouldn't be here whinning about my personal shit, but this has knocked me right off my feet. I spent the whole weekend trying to figure out how to deal with her. What hurts most is that she got layed in as less time as two weeks!! This has tormented my mind to the fullest. I felt like hitting the hell out of her but that wouldn't change anything either.so i just kept ahold of myself. I just don't know how to deal with her at the moment

Dude I have been there! The movies in your head, sleepless for days, weeks, and what I call the affair diet. I lost 32 pounds in 2 weeks. The only thing that will help you get over this is time. If you want to to stay with her and she with you then she will have to understand that trust is broken and she will have to do everything to earn that back. She will also have to deal with you asking where are you if she is late. Its hard. I feel for you. You need to talk reach out to me. I stayed because of my children and that I still love her but it doesnt go away. I can forgive but I cant forget.

 

[Rube Reaper]

Acknowledge that she should be empowered to embrace her sexuality. Tell her thank you for being willing to be your partner and ask her if there is anything you can do to improve her sex life.

 

[22*43*51]

Acknowledge that she should be empowered to embrace her sexuality. Tell her thank you for being willing to be your partner and ask her if there is anything you can do to improve her sex life.

You’re a piece of shit Jim.

 

[ChicagoFats]

Dude I have been there! The movies in your head, sleepless for days, weeks, and what I call the affair diet. I lost 32 pounds in 2 weeks. The only thing that will help you get over this is time. If you want to to stay with her and she with you then she will have to understand that trust is broken and she will have to do everything to earn that back. She will also have to deal with you asking where are you if she is late. Its hard. I feel for you. You need to talk reach out to me. I stayed because of my children and that I still love her but it doesnt go away. I can forgive but I cant forget.

Sounds like i might need to try this affair diet. 32 lbs in 2 weeks? Just didn't eat anything?

 

[Dolphincock]

Sounds like i might need to try this affair diet. 32 lbs in 2 weeks? Just didn't eat anything?

nope didnt want to. was just depressed. I looked like I had had a disease. But don't yall worry I put it back on unfortunately

 

[TJHall1]

Immediately start fucking everything you can. You’ll feel much better.

 

[GarnetPild]

Damn. If you exclude the troll who I have on ignore, every reply in this thread is civilized as well as correct.

I've had a girlfriend of 4 years cheat many years ago, never been married. Currently getting over broken heart from another 4 year relationship, but she didn't cheat, just left. Anyway, this isn't about me, just giving you an idea of where I'm coming from...you cannot think straight in your current situation. Things like this are impossible to see clearly from the inside, as your entire life is wrapped up in it. All the posters from the outside looking in, in this situation, are correct.

My advice is to calmly end it now, completely and cleanly, and try to find some things that make you happy. I spent about $4,000 on guns, holsters, and ammo this spring. It helped a bit, lol.

 

[Joe Kings]

It hurts but its over and there is nothing to hold on to. That's the best and easiest part. Its absolute. Do not waste yourself on somebody like that.

So can you share what happened?

 

[Edgehollow]

So can you share what happened?

And be as explicit as possible.

Kidding.



Kind of.


All seriousness it sucks, but this too shall pass.

 

[TheNJNole]

I know i shouldn't be here whinning about my personal shit, but this has knocked me right off my feet. I spent the whole weekend trying to figure out how to deal with her. What hurts most is that she got layed in as less time as two weeks!! This has tormented my mind to the fullest. I felt like hitting the hell out of her but that wouldn't change anything either.so i just kept ahold of myself. I just don't know how to deal with her at the moment

Big difference between cheating g/f and a cheating wife.

Two sides to a coin. Signs were already there and you likely chose to ignore them. First, ask yourself what you did to create the situation or environment for this to happen.

Are you not emotionally nurturing, do you have a small hog, do you have good communications, do you make her respect you, do you respect her?

Doesn't happen without reason.

And yes, I'm sure it would suck to be in that position. Hang in there and get your head straight.

When lines are crossed, you have to be strong enough to make very tough decisions. If she is a g/f, revenge fuck her and her friends.

Good luck

 

[Emma tenywa]

Move on now and save yourself a lot of heart ache down the road. You will find someone who cares about you and wants to spend the rest of their life you, without cheating on you. That’s all I got. Roll Tide!!!

Oh man, you have my sympathy @Emma tenywa .

I think you're absolutely justified and free to "whine" about anything here.

Been through something similar aye, it actually put me off even bothering with women for the past decade now.
(ie: Relationship wise)

Jmo, and sorry bro, I can understand how very difficult the practical application of this advise can be,...in the moment.,...

I reckon the most beneficial course of action, whether short or long term, is calmly removing one's physical self from the situation,...entirely.

It's important to understand that the whole reason for removing ones self, is to actually allow for a breif respite from the ceaseless-
psychologically & emotionally chaotic shitstorm,...which will certainly be occuring.

It is necessary to temporarily cease, or limit all levels of interaction, overall.
(ie: Psychologically, Emotionally, & Spiritually)

There's wisdom in the words you've written bro,...knocked ya right off your feet.

In a metaphorical sense,...the wise post by @sbisteve is not much different than if physically extending his hand to help a fallen brother.

Just like this post I'm writing for you bro.

Probably the best advice. The world is a big place and there is a better match for you out there somewhere.

Cut off all communication …. Just stop, like ripping off a band aid.

Like @sbisteve and the others said.......leave. Better to do it without showing any emotion. She actually did you a favor. What if you stayed with her for another 20 years with her hooring around on you? That's 20 years you'd never get back and maybe a STD you couldn't give back.

On the way out the door tell her "thanks for the sects" and hit the road. Next, start slinging your meat sickle around like a butcher jacked up on caffeine.

Best way to get over a woman is get under another

Damn. If you exclude the troll who I have on ignore, every reply in this thread is civilized as well as correct.

I've had a girlfriend of 4 years cheat many years ago, never been married. Currently getting over broken heart from another 4 year relationship, but she didn't cheat, just left. Anyway, this isn't about me, just giving you an idea of where I'm coming from...you cannot think straight in your current situation. Things like this are impossible to see clearly from the inside, as your entire life is wrapped up in it. All the posters from the outside looking in, in this situation, are correct.

My advice is to calmly end it now, completely and cleanly, and try to find some things that make you happy. I spent about $4,000 on guns, holsters, and ammo this spring. It helped a bit, lol.

Thank you guys for all the wise words. Am really grateful and right about now,i know to to do. There's nothing more to hold on to but to move on and let her go

 

[Emma tenywa]

Big difference between cheating g/f and a cheating wife.

Two sides to a coin. Signs were already there and you likely chose to ignore them. First, ask yourself what you did to create the situation or environment for this to happen.

Are you not emotionally nurturing, do you have a small hog, do you have good communications, do you make her respect you, do you respect her?

Doesn't happen without reason.

And yes, I'm sure it would suck to be in that position. Hang in there and get your head straight.

When lines are crossed, you have to be strong enough to make very tough decisions. If she is a g/f, revenge fuck her and her friends.

Good luck

I agree with you,signs were there but i ignored them. I just trusted her alot, man.

 

[Emma tenywa]

It hurts but its over and there is nothing to hold on to. That's the best and easiest part. Its absolute. Do not waste yourself on somebody like that.

So can you share what happened?

I can of course

 

[Emma tenywa]

Immediately start fucking everything you can. You’ll feel much better.

Aha! Tj

 

[Emma tenywa]

nope didnt want to. was just depressed. I looked like I had had a disease. But don't yall worry I put it back on unfortunately

I DM'd buddy

 

[TheNJNole]

I agree with you,signs were there but i ignored them. I just trusted her alot, man.

Then do a deep dive into the signs. There your answer lies....

Once that road is crossed, never the same. Sorry to say kid.

Now comes the hard part.....

 

[Emma tenywa]

Then do a deep dive into the signs. There your answer lies....

Once that road is crossed, never the same. Sorry to say kid.

Now comes the hard part.....

You wouldn't believe the reasons and much less her excuse.

 

[AC2021]

Trust is broken, it will be difficult to regain that.

If the both of you want to save your marriage, it can happen. I've seen it happen.

That being said, I don't blame you for walking away.

 

[GarnetPild]

Thank you guys for all the wise words. Am really grateful and right about now,i know to to do. There's nothing more to hold on to but to move on and let her go

Easy to say. Hard to do. Good luck bro. Will be rough for a while, but it'll be alright. What kind of hobbies you got? Maybe invest some time &/or money in that, just to pass the time & give you a little short term happiness.

 

[TheNJNole]

Best advice is invest in your well being mentally, financially and emotionally. When you bild it up, you will be in a better position for the next one......

 

[GarnetPild]

Trust is broken, it will be difficult to regain that.

If the both of you want to save your marriage, it can happen. I've seen it happen.

That being said, I don't blame you for walking away.

I have seen a marraige survive it, some good friends of my parents...but cannot imagine. You can't regain that trust imo, but in their case, I also get that they had built a life together for 30+ years, & both of them wanted to work it out. Don't think I could do it, but apparently my limit on relationships is 4 years, so probably best to ignore my advice lol.

 

[Emma tenywa]

Easy to say. Hard to do. Good luck bro. Will be rough for a while, but it'll be alright. What kind of hobbies you got? Maybe invest some time &/or money in that, just to pass the time & give you a little short term happiness.

Very hard indeed. I wana bury ma head in novels during all ma free time so that i keep myself busy

 

[Emma tenywa]

Trust is broken, it will be difficult to regain that.

If the both of you want to save your marriage, it can happen. I've seen it happen.

That being said, I don't blame you for walking away.

There's simply no assurance that she won't do it again

 

[Emma tenywa]

Best advice is invest in your well being mentally, financially and emotionally. When you bild it up, you will be in a better position for the next one......

Thank you buddy

 

[TJHall1]

There's simply no assurance that she won't do it again

Then get the fuck away from her. Don’t give her the time of day. Don’t talk to her, don’t respond. Cold turkey. Like others have said immerse yourself in something you like to do. No bitch is worth the agony cheating can cause.

 

[AC2021]

There's simply no assurance that she won't do it again

I understand.

Wash your hands and walk away.

You're certainly justified in doing so.

 

[PerdidoKeyFrisbee]

You wouldn't believe the reasons and much less her excuse.

If she comes up with ridiculous reasons/excuses for being a cum dumpster then that just solidifies the fact she's a first ballot HoF hoor. Simply tell her there's no need for all that and thank her for not stealing any more years of your life. Did you have any kids with this tramp?

 

[quickfeet]

Move on now and save yourself a lot of heart ache down the road. You will find someone who cares about you and wants to spend the rest of their life you, without cheating on you. That’s all I got. Roll Tide!!!

The last two words are the most important part of this message.

@Emma tenywa don't feel bad about bringing personal issues on here. Many times this board has provided support for people with all kinds of personal issues

 

[Emma tenywa]

If she comes up with ridiculous reasons/excuses for being a cum dumpster then that just solidifies the fact she's a first ballot HoF hoor. Simply tell her there's no need for all that and thank her for not stealing any more years of your life. Did you have any kids with this tramp?

No, we had not yet had kids

 

[quickfeet]

Big difference between cheating g/f and a cheating wife.

Two sides to a coin. Signs were already there and you likely chose to ignore them. First, ask yourself what you did to create the situation or environment for this to happen.

Are you not emotionally nurturing, do you have a small hog, do you have good communications, do you make her respect you, do you respect her?

Doesn't happen without reason.

And yes, I'm sure it would suck to be in that position. Hang in there and get your head straight.

When lines are crossed, you have to be strong enough to make very tough decisions. If she is a g/f, revenge fuck her and her friends.

Good luck

Lol'ed out loud at the "do you have a small hog" reason. If that's a good enough reason for a woman to cheat, I can't blame my wife at all

Edit: and all the reasons you mention put responsibility on him. Just as likely (if not more) it's just because she's a whore

 

[denn]

I know i shouldn't be here whinning about my personal shit, but this has knocked me right off my feet. I spent the whole weekend trying to figure out how to deal with her. What hurts most is that she got layed in as less time as two weeks!! This has tormented my mind to the fullest. I felt like hitting the hell out of her but that wouldn't change anything either.so i just kept ahold of myself. I just don't know how to deal with her at the moment

Dump the bitch. She did you a favor

 

[ChicagoFats]

Big difference between cheating g/f and a cheating wife.

Two sides to a coin. Signs were already there and you likely chose to ignore them. First, ask yourself what you did to create the situation or environment for this to happen.

Are you not emotionally nurturing, do you have a small hog, do you have good communications, do you make her respect you, do you respect her?

Doesn't happen without reason.

And yes, I'm sure it would suck to be in that position. Hang in there and get your head straight.

When lines are crossed, you have to be strong enough to make very tough decisions. If she is a g/f, revenge fuck her and her friends.

Good luck

If he really wants to get back at her he could fuck her dad.

 

[GarnetPild]

If he really wants to get back at her he could fuck her dad.

Made me think of this-

 

[yankmenoodle]

Pick your best, most trusted friend and ask, TAKE, their advice on everything. Especially if you go the divorce route.