Why haven’t you got a bidet yet?

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Oh man I love having stuff shot up my squanch. Getting it cleaned is something I try to do regularly. Don't want go for a good squanching with a dirty squanch. That's just rude.
 
My in laws have a bidet in their basement bathroom. One weekend when we were visiting (from SC), I decided to give it a whirl. What I failed to take into account is that they live in WV and this was the middle of winter. When that stream hit me, it felt like being snake bit on my bunghole. My wife heard me yelling all the way upstairs. I believe I’ll stick with paper and Dude Wipes.
 
UK had a wr named Badet that was really fast. Unfortunately he transferred to OU because they could actually throw a forward pass more than twice a game.
 

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