What to never trust...

A fart...
Back when I was still in the Navy, I trusted a fart on the wrong day. Was on my way to a medical appointment in my NWU’s, and as soon as I hit the half way point between my house and the base I sharted. Couldn’t afford to go home and miss my appointment so I drove the remaining 20 minutes and rolled into medical with my blue shirt, boots and a pair of basketball shorts.
Pretty Officer I had an appointment with that day, asked me what happened and why I was out of uniform. I told her I shit my pants, and we moved on lol.
 
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