Joke of the day...

[Cre8ive]

My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you’re ugly too.

 

[laterallyshaking]

You know, the worst thing about an apple addiction is you can't see a doctor about it.

 

[yankmenoodle]

I struggle being a kleptomaniac. Every now and then I take something for it.

 

[quickfeet]

Ask me if I'm a grape

 

[laterallyshaking]

Ask me if I'm a grape

Are you a grape?

 

[quickfeet]

Are you a grape?

no

 

[Cre8ive]

I struggle being a kleptomaniac. Every now and then I take something for it.

Kudos! Another jokester in the forum! @yankmenoodle

 

[Cre8ive]

@yankmenoodle - you really need to have your face looked at by an undertaker. You're way past a plastic surgeon. But i do see some hope if you take a chainsaw to that left side. Keep me posted.

 

[Wait What]

How do you keep an erection?

Spoiler

Don't fuck with it.

 

[MrNonSequitur]

Joe Biden got 81M legitimate votes in 2020.

 

[Wait What]

Joe Biden got 81M legitimate votes in 2020.

 

[DawgB]

I'll add one:

Man walks into bedroom with a sheep under his arm, wife laying in the bed.

He says, "this is the pig I've been fvcking". She says, "that's not a pig, dumbass".

He says, "I wasn't talking to you"

 

[Oler Ted]

@Fish in a Barrel

 

[d-tiger45]

A termite walks into a bar and asked “is the bar tender here?”

 

[tgsell]

How do you spot a blind man at a nude beach???















It's not hard.

 

[yankmenoodle]

@yankmenoodle - you really need to have your face looked at by an undertaker. You're way past a plastic surgeon. But i do see some hope if you take a chainsaw to that left side. Keep me posted.

I just wish I could get the hump off my back.

 

[Cre8ive]

I just wish I could get the hump off my back.

Chainsaw or steel bladed weed eater.

 

[Cazvol]

Did you hear about the guy that had two wooden legs? They caught on fire and burnt his ass to the ground.

 

[Alpha_Cock]

Origin Found:

 

[laterallyshaking]

Origin Found:

"What did you think when he started to cry?"
"I think he just felt sad."

Friggin Sherlock Holmes over here.