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Funny craigslist ads

TJHall1

Overlord
Joined
Jan 9, 2021
Messages
5,821
@Croot_Overlord post in the powerful quotes thread got me thinking about Craigslist. Here's a bike ad from years back:

Saddle up, b!tches, and get ready to have your nips blown off by the fastest bike in the world. I'm reluctantly selling this magnificent beast of a bike
because I'm tired of getting too many speeding tickets whilst riding it.

Whether you are gearing up for RAGBRAI, trying to impress your co-worker, Sharon, or just want to leave your friends in the dust on casual bike rides to the bar, this bike is for you.

"Ooooo damn, that's a sweet-ass bike!

~Sharon probably

Don't take this bike out in a lightning storm because you might reach 88 mph and be taken back in time to October 26th, 1985 Marty McFly style. This two-wheeled racing machine is equipped with Shimano Sora components which is Japanese for "Wicked Bad-Ass".....and also "Conch Shell" depending on the use of the word in the sentence.

This pedaled crotch rocket is made from Aluminum alloy. You know what else is made from Aluminum alloy? The mother f*cking F-14 Tomcat Fighter Jet, that's what! That's Maverick's plane in TOP GUN! If it's good enough for Pete
Mitchell, then it's good enough for you. If you hold out your arms at full speed, you would probably take off into the stratosphere. Every time you climb up on the saddle, you can feel the power between your legs and hear Highway to the Danger Zone playing softly in the background.

This speed demon has a carbon fiber fork that reduces vibrations so your hands and arms won't get numb on those long rides. In fact, the only time your hands and arms will get numb is from setting the Guinness World record of high fives
from everyone you meet while riding it.

This mobile chick magnet's frame is size M/L. So if you were graced with a height of 5'9" to 6'1", you could be comfortably riding this 24-speed panty
dropper off into the sunset with Sharon in no time.

Email me if you want to feel the need.....the need for speed.
 

BurntJ

NATIONAL CHAMP/WORLD SERIES CHAMP (DOUBLE CHAMP)
Founder
Joined
Jan 9, 2021
Messages
2,906
1-freestyle-list-photo-u1
 

Zigjr

Leader
Founder
Joined
Jan 9, 2021
Messages
37
A couple of years ago I got into a minor prank war w buddy

Put his 2 year old Mustang on Craigslist at about 60% of retail " must sell " w his cell

I had a few other things planned if needed but the battle ended there . He got 20 calls in the first hour
A couple of years ago a friend of mine put his Jeep on Craigslist. One guy called and said he’d meet him that afternoon. My buddy showed up and the guy didn’t with some excuse. Same thing happened the next day. The second time the guy didn’t show up another guy called and met with him that night and bought it. He gets a call the next day from the guy who bailed twice and told him sorry man your ass didn’t show up and I had a cash offer. A couple days later he started getting calls “hey man just calling about the goats and chickens you got.” He couldn’t figure it out. Turns out that fucker had posted his number on Craigslist saying he had goats and chickens. He called Craigslist and since he didn’t post it he couldn’t get it taken down. He got calls for 3 months about them haha. Dude was an asshole for doing that but pretty damn funny. Sounds like something a mainboarder would do.
 

Zach10

Leader
Joined
Dec 1, 2020
Messages
78
I used to prank people by posting a m4m ad with their cellphone asking for dick pics. Since thats gone I know just apply for a refi quote and use their number. They get blown up.
 

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