TJHall1
Legendary
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2021
- Messages
- 5,787
@Croot_Overlord post in the powerful quotes thread got me thinking about Craigslist. Here's a bike ad from years back:
Saddle up, b!tches, and get ready to have your nips blown off by the fastest bike in the world. I'm reluctantly selling this magnificent beast of a bike
because I'm tired of getting too many speeding tickets whilst riding it.
Whether you are gearing up for RAGBRAI, trying to impress your co-worker, Sharon, or just want to leave your friends in the dust on casual bike rides to the bar, this bike is for you.
"Ooooo damn, that's a sweet-ass bike!
~Sharon probably
Don't take this bike out in a lightning storm because you might reach 88 mph and be taken back in time to October 26th, 1985 Marty McFly style. This two-wheeled racing machine is equipped with Shimano Sora components which is Japanese for "Wicked Bad-Ass".....and also "Conch Shell" depending on the use of the word in the sentence.
This pedaled crotch rocket is made from Aluminum alloy. You know what else is made from Aluminum alloy? The mother f*cking F-14 Tomcat Fighter Jet, that's what! That's Maverick's plane in TOP GUN! If it's good enough for Pete
Mitchell, then it's good enough for you. If you hold out your arms at full speed, you would probably take off into the stratosphere. Every time you climb up on the saddle, you can feel the power between your legs and hear Highway to the Danger Zone playing softly in the background.
This speed demon has a carbon fiber fork that reduces vibrations so your hands and arms won't get numb on those long rides. In fact, the only time your hands and arms will get numb is from setting the Guinness World record of high fives
from everyone you meet while riding it.
This mobile chick magnet's frame is size M/L. So if you were graced with a height of 5'9" to 6'1", you could be comfortably riding this 24-speed panty
dropper off into the sunset with Sharon in no time.
Email me if you want to feel the need.....the need for speed.
Saddle up, b!tches, and get ready to have your nips blown off by the fastest bike in the world. I'm reluctantly selling this magnificent beast of a bike
because I'm tired of getting too many speeding tickets whilst riding it.
Whether you are gearing up for RAGBRAI, trying to impress your co-worker, Sharon, or just want to leave your friends in the dust on casual bike rides to the bar, this bike is for you.
"Ooooo damn, that's a sweet-ass bike!
~Sharon probably
Don't take this bike out in a lightning storm because you might reach 88 mph and be taken back in time to October 26th, 1985 Marty McFly style. This two-wheeled racing machine is equipped with Shimano Sora components which is Japanese for "Wicked Bad-Ass".....and also "Conch Shell" depending on the use of the word in the sentence.
This pedaled crotch rocket is made from Aluminum alloy. You know what else is made from Aluminum alloy? The mother f*cking F-14 Tomcat Fighter Jet, that's what! That's Maverick's plane in TOP GUN! If it's good enough for Pete
Mitchell, then it's good enough for you. If you hold out your arms at full speed, you would probably take off into the stratosphere. Every time you climb up on the saddle, you can feel the power between your legs and hear Highway to the Danger Zone playing softly in the background.
This speed demon has a carbon fiber fork that reduces vibrations so your hands and arms won't get numb on those long rides. In fact, the only time your hands and arms will get numb is from setting the Guinness World record of high fives
from everyone you meet while riding it.
This mobile chick magnet's frame is size M/L. So if you were graced with a height of 5'9" to 6'1", you could be comfortably riding this 24-speed panty
dropper off into the sunset with Sharon in no time.
Email me if you want to feel the need.....the need for speed.
